Music has saved my life in more ways than one.

      At an early age I knew that music was my destiny. I started out singing to my moms tapes in her car at the age of 2 or 3. My mom thought it was so cute, and yes back then we had tape players in cars. I know everyone has cd players and ipod adapters today. Anyway back to what I was saying.
       My mom was a very musical person, but singing wasn't her thing. I grew up listening to my moms music which consisted of Natalie Cole, Celine Dion, The Bee gees, Elton John, FleetWood Mac, Bob Segar, and  much more but too many to name.  I sang at church, school and of course at home. My mom didn't think that I would want a career in singing, so she paid no attention to it.  When I was 8 years old I decided I wanted to sing for the choir at my church and I did. It was one of the best feelings to know that people were liking what I was doing. I knew right then maybe this is what I was supposed to do with my life.
     As for instruments I always wanted to play the flute, saxophone and clarinet.  I remember in elementary school the  band teacher his name was Mr. Santino. He used to come in every year and see if students would try out for lessons. I tried out every year, but my mom told me that it wasn't worth the money at the time.  I just shrugged it off and asked if I could go into karate instead and she told me I could. I did that for 2 years and then quit. I didn't like hurting people, even though I really wasn't hurting them. I just felt like I was being a bully. When I stopped karate I was one sash under a purple belt. I was so close to getting that purple belt and I really worked hard for it.  Now back to my music career lol.
       In 4th grade I finally convinced my mother to let me play clarinet. I was so freaking happy that she let me do this. Of course there's always a consequence to my actions and everyone's. My twin sister had tried out for the same instrument and got in as well. My sister and I did pretty much everything together, until my parents divorce in 2003. I'll talk about that later in another post.
      My sister and I practiced every day for an hour, but I am an overachiever and always have been. I practiced as soon as I got home till I went to sleep of course I had breaks, but nothing made me happier than playing clarinet. I still have my lesson book it has 30 -40 pages in it. I learned that whole book in a week. My sister it took a little longer like a month or so because it was lessons not a band setting. I remember what my sister told my music teacher this is her exact wording. "Mr. Santino, Sarah can play anything in that book and even the last song on the back page." Mr. Santino smile and asked me to play it so I did. I even had it memorized. I was so cocky and I knew I was good. That day I got to be in concert band.  My sister did as well, but my sister didn't have the passion or dedication to music like I had. She quit after the school year was over.
      In concert band or any band that is, there are levels of what instrument you play. There is 1st chair which is the highest you can be. 2nd chair which is pretty good and 3rd chair.  Each chair has a different responsibility. 1st has the hardest and highest notes, 2nd which is a little lower but kind of simple and 3rd its easy as pie. Playing in a band is like working. You always need to work your way up the ladder, and  that I did. I went from 3rd to 1st in a week. I was the best except for Juila Feddirico. She was one of the best I knew and to tell you the truth she scared me. She was the popular rich type you know what I'm talking about? I bet you do.  I played in band until 7th grade and I did some marching band as well for the high school.  After 7th grade my parents split up and my sister, mom and I moved to a new town and I just didn't want to play anymore. The band director came to my class room looking for me and pleaded with me to get me to play again, but I was just torn and he could see that. He was so nice to put my name in the band picture in the yearbook that year. That point was the downfall in my life.
      If I didn't have music, I really wouldn't be here. I was depressed and out of my gourd. I had no friends, my father was in a different town, my mother was getting remarried and my sister didn't want anything to do with me. I started to listen to metal, emo, punk rock, and a few other genres. Since I had no friends, I always talked to people in my classes and tried to see if they would be my friends. No one ever wanted to hang out, outside of school. People would have told you that I'm was a pretty cool person, who loved a challenge. I helped people with their homework, and participated in class all the time. I did have acquaintances in school. I sat with a bunch of cool people at lunch. I wouldn't eat and people would think that I was insane for doing that. I just used to work on my homework and just try to get good grades. One of the cafeteria staff called me studious one time. Towards the end of the year, I changed. I just became someone who I really didn't want to be. I always had my head phones in, I never wanted to talk to anyone. 
    After a year of silence and sorrow I went to 9th grade. Everyone wants to go to high school, but when you get there you really don't know what to expect. I had more friends in 9th grade than I've ever had. I was a goth and no one cared. People talked to me hugged me, let me sit at their table. It was awesome. Sadly to say I was still depressed and just wanted to hide in a corner by myself. There were so many people who cared about me there. I really owe my friends a lot. They saved my life. The one person who really lifted me up was Jimmy aka Chicken. He saw the person I couldn't see that I was.  We met in Photography class.  I'll talk about Jimmy in a diffrent blog post. I don't want to get way off track on my topic.
     I then moved to Arizona at the end of my freshman year. I went to school at Deer Valley high in Glendale Arizona. There I opened up and tried to get out of my goth days. I made tons of friends and finally got the nerve to get in a high school choir. I became a choir member in my junior year. I started in womens' choir which was pretty lame. I loved all my choir members though. Don't get me wrong. I remember Jessica Short would sit next to me on the soprano side and I would be singing something and she would say you're going to be famous one day and I will totally say I knew you and buy your cd's. Even then I was skeptical of my voice. My 1st solo in choir was from the sound of music.  I told my mom about it and she didn't even get the night off to see me. I brought my sister and that was all the family I had there that night. My concert director Mr. Simms he was an awesome person. I asked him a few days after the concert could I go to mixed choir. I knew i had to try out, but he just let me in. I was so shocked. Once again I made it to the top. This choir worked its butt off to get in to regionals. We had so many concerts and things to do. I even tried out for a musical for the school. I would have done it but work and school just got in the way. I got to sing at the spring fourm in  Cali.  our choir placed for gold and we won. After that we all went to Disney Land and had so much fun. It really was the time of my life. After that we had one more concert to do for the school and then sing at the Graduation. We sang together we are one. It was such a great song. We had people crying left and right. I'm even crying because most of my friends were seniors and I wouldn't get to see them again.
     During the next year. I made my you-tube channel. I had 10 subscribers back then. I finally had the courage to just do what I wanted. Now I'm going for American idol this year. I'm so excited and happy that my life has panned out the way it is.  Music has saved me. Without the love and support from my friends I wouldn't be who i am today. Thank you so much. I love you all.

I will be writing posts about jimmy and some of my high school memories. so if you're interested please come back and read all about it. thank you so much.


btw. here is a clip of my choir singing....






 

Comments

  1. Did you ever maintain contact with your former choir members? If so, how are they doing? Would they consider having a "reunion?" Maybe you could even form a band with some of them. It's food for thought. Also you mentioned that you before you moved to AZ you tried to make friends but then stopped and just kept to yourself. I understand what it's like going to a new school and trying to make friends, I've done it myself, but what do you think was the deciding factor that made you just become a loner?

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